vignette

“... so now let’s talk a little bit about what you want from this next life.”

“Hmmm. Well, there are a number of things that would be fun to try, but I guess the things that I think are most important are to have long thick beautiful dark hair and to have a lovely singing voice.”

“And the hair is important because ...”

“In my previous life my hair was the bane of my existence. It was thin and fine so it would never stay the way it was styled, and I had this natural part a little ways down from the top of my head so it always looked funny. So if my hair is pretty, maybe I’ll feel pretty and I won’t be so intimidated by the other girls and I can really enjoy myself when I’m flirting with all the boys.”

“I see ... pretty hair. Okay, and the singing ...”

“In my last life I was sort of an alto. I mean, I had a limited range, not much talent, and my voice seemed to break a lot, sort of like a yodel, and it was horrible so even though I enjoyed singing I couldn’t really sing in public since it sounded so bad. It was an awful thing to deal with. So in this life I would love to be able to sing soprano anytime anywhere and to sound like Barbra Streisand.”

“A wonderful voice ... and is that all? Special talent? Special skill?”

“No. Well, I guess I’d like to be pretty, too. Or at least attractive so I’ll have lots of boyfriends.”

“Okay. Have you given any thought to the main thing you’d like to work on in this next life?”

“Weeeell, I guess I need to be more patient and to stop being so bossy and to be nicer to the boys. But honestly, guys can be so stupid! And they never get jokes and they think slow and they take longer to grow up and it’s just frustrating. So like I said, maybe I need more patience.”

“All right. We’ve had a good discussion and now you will be moving on to the retreat where you will rest and quietly prepare yourself for your next journey. Remember that your gifts and challenges will be presented in a unique way so that your learning experience can be explored to the fullest.”

Some time later in rural west Texas, a young redneck and his spunky wife welcomed their first child into the world -- a beautiful, dark-haired baby boy.