February 27: Police patrolling the school zone came upon a fowl incident. Evidence indicated that a large voracious seagull had broken into a street-side garbage container, purloined a piece of bread, and dragged the pilfered pastry into the street. J. Livingston's intent to ingest apparently averted all his avian attention from approaching autos, as he was summarily executed by same. Amid a chorus of cries and caws from his compadres, officers sealed Mr. Gull's fate and feathers into the bin, which bore the bread of his karmic encounter.
February 26: A concerned mother contacted police upon learning her teenage son had run away with a ne'er-do-well friend of his. Officers searched for the boys, and found them a few hours later. The sensible runaway was taken home by police officers. His sweaty not-so-sensible friend was re-contacted a short time later when he ran out of breath and stopped running, and he too was turned over to his mom.
February 18: Residents at a trailer park reported an intoxicated man sitting on their porch, refusing to leave. Officers located the inebriate several porches away. He was determined to find which home was his through the process of elimination. Officers helped him find the door that fit his key so he could pour himself to bed.
February 14: A police officer specialist observed a man walking in front of the police department who was wanted on a warrant. Police officers contacted the 21-year-old resident nearby and arrested him for the warrant.
February 14: Police were called to assist U.S. Customs with a driver who had been denied entry to Canada. Although the 14-year-old Montana motorist's sense of adventure was compelling and Canadian authorities were impressed with the fact that the car she was driving had been reported stolen in Missoula, they still decided not to allow her to immigrate to the Great White North. The young cowgirl was arrested and the 1979 Buick she'd rustled was towed to the corral.
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